Tag Archives: Bret Michaels

Bret Michaels got his ride on

Bret Michaels released a song and video for some crappy supercross show or something. I honestly haven’t paid attention, the only sport I watch is YouPorn.

Laugh at the vid above and troll all your friends with it, by posting it on their wall. Then mention Alex from Dose of Metal as the source for it. Then tell them you were about to do something, but then took an arrow to the knee. Then post some badly drawn troll face and tell them to press J over and over again.

If the paragraph above makes no sense to you, congratulations: You probably had sex at least once.

Shocking: Bret Michaels is on another reality show

I don’t know about you guys, but I have a feeling Bret Michaels likes to be on TV, especially on reality shows. A stab in the dark, I know, but just this gut feeling I have…

“Poison singer Bret Michaels will appear on the Friday, January 6 episode of the heart-tugging original feel-good series ‘Extreme Makeover: Home Edition’. In the episode, entitled ‘Gibbs Family,’ ‘Extreme Makeover: Home Edition’ travels to Fayette County, Iowa to surprise the Gibbs family.“

Read full article here.

The episode will air Friday, January 6th, on ABC. It will be between 8 pm and 10 pm ET, in case you want to know the exact time you need to avoid ABC.

Friday Top 10: Stage incidents

Last week we covered concert riots, and at one point I mentioned I might make a follow up. Here we are, it’s Friday Next, and let’s see if the sequel is any good.

Make the jump for ten funny, weird or simply fucked up stage incidents.

Weak Recap: Alex Dominates II

We’re back again, with another edition of our not-weak-at-all week recap – The Weak Recap (see what I did there?).

This week’s article is a sequel of sorts. Think big Hollywood blockbusters, well actually, to be honest. we’re more ‘S.Darko’ than ‘Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part 2′ (although Harry Potter is gay anyways), or more ‘Dumb and Dumberer’ than ‘The Two Towers.’ So actually, it’s like one of those shitty straight to DVD sequels, but hey, shit sells and you’re still buying, right?

Why is this a sequel? Well, it seems Alex has been, more or less, dominating again because I’m too fucking lazy, and Guido probably has a life outside of the internet, or something.

Without further ado, I present to you this week’s Weak Recap. Now make the fucking jump, before I push you.

Nikki doesn’t really like Bret

I don’t know what the problem is between these two, but one of them could use less letters in his name. The other one could probably use an extra T in his first name.

Anyway, Nikki Sixx seems to have no problems talking shit about Bret and his band. In fact, the only problem he seems to have is he can’t stop talking shit about Bret. Look:

“We didn’t want the tour, because of the reasons not personally, but because of keeping things segregated and then when he went and took it into his own hands that it was like his idea — yeah. He was the one on the phone that told me he wanted to do it because his band needs credibility and Mötley Crüe is a credible band — it pissed us off, because we were sucker-punched.“

Read full interview here.

Oh yeah dude, Mötley Crüe is such a credible band… There’s so much credibility in that group that all bands should tour with them.

Look, I’m not taking sides, mainly because I hate both Mötley and Poison. But Bret always struck me as a very nice guy. I’ve even watched him on Celebrity Apprentice. He was nice, laid back, and professional. Since Nikki is doing all the shit-talking, I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say Nikki iss thhe prrobblemm.

Alex advice: Shut up, play your music, do the tour, stop creating all this drama.

Metalheadlines: Boring edition

I’m not gonna lie to you, all the news in this post is boring as hell and probably won’t interest you. But hey, it is what it is, so let’s get rollin’:

New Ozzy guitarist Gus G. (pictured above) has an upcoming tutorial video for Guitarist Magazine. You can find a sample video right here. Don’t hold your breath.

Evile‘s new album is called Five Serpent’s Teeth and it will be released on September 26. If you’re like me, you probably don’t care about its artwork. But if you’re not like me, you can check it out here. It’s not bad.

I didn’t watch the 2009 Tony Awards, but I wish I did. Because this happened. And Bret Michaels is now suing them. The lawsuit itself has been moved to New York. Isn’t that where Metalsucks is located? They should go there and make fun of Bret in person.

Corey Taylor (of Slipknot and Stone Sour fame) wrote a book. He will read from that book online via a webchat. This chat happens Monday, July 11 ad 5 pm EST. If you happen to be online around that time, simply avoid this site.

Supergroup Chickenfoot signed a distribution deal with eOne Music. If you ever wanted to hear what a post-David Lee Roth Van Halen would sound like with Satriani on guitar and RHCP’s Chad Smith on drums, wait for their new album which is due in September.

Weak Recap: First Class

Hey, guess who’s back, it’s those regular superheroes of the Metal community, Mark and Guido. Once again, we’ll be recapping what we’ve been up to this past week (usually a combination of sleeping, eating and masturbation – we all lead interesting lives here at Dose of Metal).

So, basically it’s that time of the week when someone massages my ego, I then in turn massage their ego, then they massage my… You know what, doesn’t matter. Make the jump to see my awesome interview with the awesome Guido.

Bret Michaels ain’t holdin’ no grudges, yo

Poison and Mötley Crüe never really got along, because you know, girls fight. They probably used different mascara brands and had an argument over it. You never know with chicks.

But Bret Michaels is being the bigger woman here and saying that he has nothing against the other Spice Girls. He didn’t really call them that, that’s all me, cause I’m trying to stir the pot further.

“I want to make it very clear. I’m not a grudge guy, ever. They have said a lot of negative stuff about Poison. Vince (Neil) has toured with me and we’ve ridden motorcycles together. Nikki (Sixx) and Tommy (Lee) have said a lot of negative things about a lot of people, and I was one of them.  [...] I don’t know what the rhyme or reason is, I like some of their music. Fans want the tour. I think it could be a great tour for fans if we could just put our feelings aside. I think we can have a great time“

Read full interview here.

Bret has a point. I mean, all they need to do is take a look at The Big Four and how successful they’ve been these past two years and they could all meet and put their grudges aside. Maybe exchange Chanel gift cards, too.

Hey, get Bon Jovi and do a Big Faux tour.

Bret is still not healthy

Say what you will about Bret, his wig or his music, but you can’t deny that he’s been pretty optimistic considering his health problems. He’s had some more, by the way:

“While recovering from heart surgery, Bret Michaels suffered a massive drop in blood pressure, but his doctor found the cause and the singer is doing better again. “

Read full article here.

So after struggling with diabetes his whole life, he’s had a mini-stroke, went into a coma and had heart surgery and he’s still having problems. Listen, I’m not gonna crack any jokes, considering how much shit he’s been through, he seems pretty cool about. I once got an awful cold that kept me in bed for 3 days and I whined like crazy…

Get well soon, Bret. We want to keep making fun of you without feeling guilty about it.

Bret Michaels is famous

Poison frontman and toupée superstar Bret Michaels seems to be famous.

According to People Magazine, he is one of the ‘25 Most Intriguing People of 2010.’
According to Dose Of Metal, no he isn’t.