Rolling Stone’s Top 100 guitarists of all time makes Alex laugh

So Rolling Stone magazine has a new Top 100 out, and it’s about the best guitarists of all time… Now, I do know how hard it must be to put such a top together, you have to take a lot of things into consideration, and no matter what, people will always be disappointed.

But I really think this Top is overall a piece of shit. I’m sorry, nothing against the magazine, but it just makes me laugh.

James Hetfield is ranked 87th. Dimebag is ranked 92nd. You know what Tom Morello is ranked? Fucking 40th.

I mean I got nothing against the guy, but how can the guy who uses every pedal in the goddamn universe rank about 50 places higher than two of the most influential metal guitarists? He’s even four places higher than Mark Knopfler, and that really is an amazing guitarist. Take away all of his pedals, what does Tom have, anyway, when compared to those three?

Kurt Cobain is also ranked higher than Dime and Jaymz.

Now, about the first places, I do agree with them. Jimi Hendrix is, of course, in first place, followed by Eric Clapton and Jimmy Page. Other wonderful guitarists are very high up, which is another plus for the article — Chuck Berry (7th), Eddie Van Halen (8th), Angus Young (24th) and Tony Iommi (25th).

I do have a problem with Keith Richards getting number four. I mean, I love the Stones, and I think they’re wonderful — they also put an amazing show live. But is Keith really above all those other names? I know it’s probably his writing, not his proficiency, that got him there… But the fourth guitarist of all time? I don’t think so. Are they biased cause they share (almost) the same name as his band?

The whole top is a mess, and metalheads got fucked. Rolling Stone usually has great articles, so how could this happen?

Oh, the guy who plays guitar in Blink-182 was one of the voters. Alongside him, Billy Corgan and a shitload of people I never heard of. Well, with such a roster of amazing talents (such as the dude in Blink), no wonder they screwed it up.

Good job on *most* of the first places, but shame on you for neglecting or underestimating some fine metal guitarists. Hope you redeem yourself, Rolling Stone.

You can read the full article here. Keep in mind that it has that awful image scroller thing, so you can only browse it one name at a time. If you want a headache-free list of the Top 100, make the jump.

 100. Lindsey Buckingham
 99. Thurston Moore
 98. Alex Lifeson
 97. Steve Jones
 96. Bruce Springsteen
 95. Roger McGuinn
 94. Peter Buck
 93. Paul Simon
 92. Dimebag Darrell
 91. Dave Davies
 90. Tom Verlaine
 89. Bonnie Raitt
 88. Carl Perkins
 87. James Hetfield
 86. J Mascis
 85. Andy Summers
 84. Joe Perry
 83. Eddie Hazel
 82. Nels Cline
 81. Lou Reed
 80. Buddy Holly
 79. Mike Campbell
 78. John Fahey
 77. Willie Nelson
 76. Robby Krieger
 75. Johni Mitchell
 74. Dick Dale
 73. Kurt Cobaine
 72. John Frusciante
 71. Robert Johnson
 70. Jack White
 69. Richard Thompson
 68. John McLaughlin
 67. T-Bone Walker
 66. Leslie West
 65. Slash
 64. Duane Eddy
 63. Johnny Winter
 62. Rober Fripp
 61. Dickey Betts
 60. Ron Asheton
 59. Robbie Robertson
 58. Peter Green
 57. Rory Gallagher
 56. Albert Collins
 55. John Lennon
 54. Joe Walsh
 53. Otis Rush
 52. Clarence White
 51. Johnny Marr
 50. Ritchie Blackmore
 49. Muddy Waters
 48. Johnny Greenwood
 47. Stephen Stills
 46. Jerry Garcia
 45. Link Wray
 44. Mark Knopfler
 43. Hubert Sumlin
 42. Mike Bloomfield
 41. Mick Ronson
 40. Tom Morello
 39. Steve Cropper
 38. The Edge
 37. Mick Taylor
 36. Randy Rhoads
 35. John Lee Hooker
 34. Curtis Mayfield
 33. Prince
 32. Billy Gibbons
 31. Ry Cooder
 30. Elmore James
 29. Scotty Moore
 28. Johnny Ramone
 27. Bo Diddley
 26. Brian May
 25. Tony Iommi
 24. Angus Young
 23. Buddy Guy
 22. Frank Zappa
 21. Chet Atkins
 20. Carlos Santana
 19. James Burton
 18. Les Paul
 17. Neil Young
 16. Derek Trucks
 15. Freddy King
 14. David Gilmour
 13. Albert King
 12. Stevie Ray Vaughan
 11. George Harrison
 10. Pete Townshend
 9. Duane Allman
 8. Eddie Van Halen
 7. Chuck Berry
 6. B.B. King
 5. Jeff Beck
 4. Keith Richards
 3. Jimmy Page
 2. Eric Clapton
 1. Jimi Hendrix

If you’re wondering, yes, I typed that myself after going through the whole thing. Meal journalism at its finest, I didn’t just copy-paste it from somewhere…


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