God Dethroned unveil album artwork and tracklist

Dutch Blackened Death Metal legends God Dethroned recently unveiled the album artwork and tracklisting for their upcoming album ‘Under the Sign of the Iron Mask’.

Artwork and tracklist after the jump.

In other news, the Netherlands shouldn’t be a country. Amsterdam on the other hand should be.

Redneck's Lamb of God

The name Lamb Of God sounds like a punchline to a Judd Appatow joke about a Christian Easter meal. Just imagine, Seth Rogen and Paul Rudd are in a cafe, talking about chicks like the awkward but lovable geeks they are, and one of them makes an analogy to sex by using “and I ate her lamb of god like it was Easter in Vatican,” making a clever joke all while being borderline politically incorrect. They laugh, the audience laughs, they make a zillion dollars and I die a little inside.

Anyway, I’m not gonna bore you with my clever script ideas. Lamb Of God‘s guitarist means business, and he’s here to tell us how he stole came up with the riff for their non-hit single, “Redneck.” Read it here, yo.

Black Label Video

You know, Kirk Hammett gets a lot of shit for his overuse of the wah pedal, but nobody really says anything about Zakk Wylde’s. Why is that? Is it because Kirk actually showers?

Anyway, apparently Zakk and his band, Johnnie Walker Black Label Society just shot a video.

“Black Label Society recently shot a video for the song “Overlord”with directors Eric Zimmerman (who?) and Nik Jamgocyan (who?) of Master Cylinder (oh right, now I know </sarcasm>). The track comes off the band’s new album, “Order Of The Black.”

Not only do I not know who the directors are, but I can’t even spell their names properly without insulting some country or culture from God-knows-where. This isn’t really news. Why am I posting it, then? No fucking clue… Why are you reading it, smarty pants? I know you are, but what am I? Fuck off…

Serj has fans?

There’s one thing you need to know about Serj Tankian fans. They don’t really exist. So imagine my surprise when I read that he has answered fan-submitted questions.

That’s like being 25 and hearing Santa is waiting for your letter. I mean, at a certain age you just stop believing in this stuff. Of course, this begs the question “Is your dad dressing up as a Serj fan and submitting questions?” — Good point. I’ll get back to you on that. In the meantime, check out this hilarious pretend game Serj played, after the jump.

When asked why every Armenian surname ends with “-ian,” Serj had no comment.

Fact of the Day

Many rockstars and musicians suffer with drug addiction and alcoholism during their careers.  However, not Gene Simmons of Kiss.  Instead, Gene Simmons is apparently addicted to sex, and claims he has slept with more than 5000 women in his lifetime.

Us clever-clogs at Dose of Metal, after much calculation, worked out that this works out at around 5000 minutes Gene could have spent thinking up new ways to sell out write music.

I wonder if he uses those “Kiss Kondoms”… *shudder*

Picture after the jump.