Evanescence will smack you in the face

In a recent interview with MTV, Evanescence frontwoman claims the band’s latest effort, will be the ‘heaviest record they’ve ever done’ (which they totally didn’t say about the last record at all) and “will smack you in the face”.

Funnily enough, if anyone ever played me Evanescence I’d probably smack them in the face, although I must make it clear I do not condone violence at all. Unless, Evanescence‘s music is involved of course.

In seriousness though, putting aside my snide comments, I really must thank Evanescene. Their last album, 2006’s The Open Door, provided me with the perfect Christmas gift for someone stupid that I hate.

Moving on, fans of Evanescence should check out We Are The Fallen instead. They’re also shit, but I just find it hilarious that they contain more original members of Evanescence and sound more like Evanescence, than erm, well Evanescence.

Metallica still kick ass

There are many stereotypes associated with metalheads. Most of them are about hygiene, but one predominant stereotype seems to be “Let’s diss Metallica, because all pure metalheadz do it lolz!!1111″

I know what you’re thinking: But Alex, you make fun of Metallica all the time! True, but it’s tongue-in-cheek humor which is aimed at every band out there, not just them. It’s how we roll around here. I’m talking about people who genuinely try to take a shit on this band for the sake of taking a shit (on this band).

If you’re one of those guys who just never liked them, this article isn’t about you. If you’re a guy who liked/loved 80s Metallica, then just gave up being a fan because of 90s and especially early 2000s Metallica, this article isn’t about you either. If you spend your days commenting on each Metallica-related article on Blabbermouth, saying the same thing over and over again, and using the ‘sell out’ argument, this article is definitely about you. Bitch

So no matter how much you love or hate this band, continue reading this article and read my flawless arguments which contradict this popular trend with metalheads.

Fanboy alert!

Metal Kino: True Norwegian Black Metal

The early Black Metal scene and its actions pretty much defined the most obscure movement within the Metal genre. It doesn’t matter if you agree or disagree with their motives to burn down over 50 churches between 1992 and 1996, these musicians — and in some cases free riders and “fans” — crossed a line that shouldn’t be crossed. Countless innocent people could have been hurt and/or killed during these acts.

With that out of the way, I do have to admit that I understand their motives and I have a weird, maybe a bit morbid, interest in these kind of stories. Like with GG Allin or Niklas Kvarforth, I find myself attracted to these stories.

Even before I started getting into Black Metal musically, I was extremely interested in stories about Black Metal. Stories that had nothing to do with the musical side of the genre. Stories about church burnings, self-mutilation, torture etc.

Stories like the ones told in True Norwegian Black Metal, a documentary that mostly centers around former Gorgoroth vocalist Gaahl. You can see the most popular, and often ridiculed, piece of an interview with Gaahl, taken from that film, above. Surely, I’m using it to lighten up the mood a little bit, especially considering the documentary is rather dark in itself.

But don’t misunderstand me, I’ve watched TNBM (a couple of times) with an open mind and so should you if you’re interested in Black Metal or just obscure stories about a couple of weird people. Make the jump to watch the 5-part documentary now.

Anvil are super famous

That’s right, if you hadn’t heard, Canadian legends, Anvil, have now progressed from being ‘just famous’ to now being “super famous”, At least that’s what drummer Robb Reiner’s assessment of the band is. Not that he’s biased or anything, of course.

He’s also modest and didn’t feel any pressure with writing the band’s new album, Juggernaut of Justice, released in May 2011.

“Well, let’s be realistic. Of course we felt no pressure, because we had the material in hand all along and our mission was to make the most true-to-the-classic-form Anvil album we’ve ever made and we had to make sure that we stood up and that we were gonna be counted this time, musically. We were looking forward to the challenge more than the pressure, you know. We had no choice but to do it and I think that we’re definitely are gonna be counted this time.”

Source: Blabbermouth.

In other news, my lunch is super awesome and I’m just about to wash my super comfortable clothes.

Ever wondered why Slipknot have 9 members?

Have you ever wondered why Slipknot need 9 members in the band? Well, watch the video of the band’s recent performance at Sonisphere above and all becomes clear. It’s obvious the band need a DJ to be able to jump into the crowd and a clown to bang a steel drum.