Rolling Stone’s Top 100 guitarists of all time makes Alex laugh
So Rolling Stone magazine has a new Top 100 out, and it's about the best guitarists of all time... Now, I do know how hard it must be to put such a top together, you have to take a lot of things into consideration, and no matter what, people will always be disappointed.
But I really think this Top is overall a piece of shit. I'm sorry, nothing against the magazine, but it just makes me laugh.
James Hetfield is ranked 87th. Dimebag is ranked 92nd. You know what Tom Morello is ranked? Fucking 40th.
I mean I got nothing against the guy, but how can the guy who uses every pedal in the goddamn universe rank about 50 places higher than two of the most influential metal guitarists? He's even four places higher than Mark Knopfler, and that really is an amazing guitarist. Take away all of his pedals, what does Tom have, anyway, when compared to those three?
Kurt Cobain is also ranked higher than Dime and Jaymz.
Now, about the first places, I do agree with them. Jimi Hendrix is, of course, in first place, followed by Eric Clapton and Jimmy Page. Other wonderful guitarists are very high up, which is another plus for the article -- Chuck Berry (7th), Eddie Van Halen (8th), Angus Young (24th) and Tony Iommi (25th).
I do have a problem with Keith Richards getting number four. I mean, I love the Stones, and I think they're wonderful -- they also put an amazing show live. But is Keith really above all those other names? I know it's probably his writing, not his proficiency, that got him there... But the fourth guitarist of all time? I don't think so. Are they biased cause they share (almost) the same name as his band?
The whole top is a mess, and metalheads got fucked. Rolling Stone usually has great articles, so how could this happen?
Oh, the guy who plays guitar in Blink-182 was one of the voters. Alongside him, Billy Corgan and a shitload of people I never heard of. Well, with such a roster of amazing talents (such as the dude in Blink), no wonder they screwed it up.
Good job on *most* of the first places, but shame on you for neglecting or underestimating some fine metal guitarists. Hope you redeem yourself, Rolling Stone.
You can read the full article here. Keep in mind that it has that awful image scroller thing, so you can only browse it one name at a time. If you want a headache-free list of the Top 100, make the jump.
Halford considers himself “a lower-case gay.” Alex laughs at the term.
Rob Halford is a metal icon, regardless of what type of porn he watches. His sexuality is none of my business, but his description of his sexuality simply made me laugh.
"I consider myself a lower-case gay, not screaming like my good friend [porn director and drag queen] Chi Chi LaRue. I love all my friends in the community, and if the moment came [for induction into the Hall Of Fame], it would be a tremendous moment, not just for the band and our fans, but for the whole LGBT community."
Read full article here.
I never heard of an upper-case gay... Thinking about it, that sounds like Elton John.
But seriously, I guess he means he's not all 'in your face' about his sexuality -- which is true. But could he not think of a better term?
And why would his 'Hall of Fame' induction be a 'tremendous moment' for the LGBT? Surely the LGBT wants equal treatment for gays and lesbians, so why would they make a big deal out of Rob's induction, in a 'OH GOODIE, ONE OF US GOT IN!!!' way? Isn't that against the concept of 'equal rights'?
The 'Hall of Fame' is all about music, and Judas Priest have done a lot for it. They deserve to be there, sexuality is not an issue, therefore making this induction a 'win' for the gay community is, to me, kind of against what they stand for.
Besides, it's not like Rob Halford is the first gay guy to be inducted. Weren't Metallica inducted recently? Kirk has company.
I keed, I keed...
Winter warmer
“You lie in the snow. Cold, but not dead…” - ‘Burn’ by Neurosis
Winter is the darkest time of the year. It is marked by death: plants shrivel and fade, weaker animals starve, and the natural world slows to a veritable crawl. Despite this, I find some peace in this process, as I know it is both ephemeral and necessary; a cleansing in preparation for rebirth. Civilization, though it has tried, has not freed us from these natural rhythms.
The music of Neurosis embodies this progression; the passing of the old to make way for the new. They are often described as a force of nature, but in reality they are just a reflection – as is all good art.
The Eye of Every Storm is their most primal album. Stripped of the apocalyptic, layered sound of previous works, ‘Eye’ is open, raw, and human. It is men coming to terms with their place in the natural order of things. Eventually, we all must do this. Winter is the time for such contemplation.
So start a fire, pour yourself a dark ale (currently Pyramid’s “Snow Cap Winter Warmer” for me), and grow a beard while Neurosis guides you through the winter. You’re cold, but not dead.
Check out a YouTube playlist here.
Time for some fine Hungarian metal
The video above showcases one of the Hungarian artists I love most, namely Leander. The song is easily recognizable, "Szomoru Vasarnap", although many of you might know it as "Gloomy Sunday". Kudos to Attila "Mowgli" Voros, who fulfills the duties of live guitar playing for Nevermore.
Machine Head threaten to ruin my birthday
When it comes to Machine Head, I'm like the girl who puts up with years of physical and emotional abuse because she knows that, deep down, he's the same man she fell in love with during that amazing summer they shared like 20 years ago. Because I'm still hoping for 1994 Robb Flynn to sweep me off my feet and tell me everything is going to be OK, I always try to see Machine Head when they come to my city. So it goes without saying that I was excited to see this on Blabbermouth the other day:
San Francisco Bay Area metallers Machine Head will embark on a North American headlining tour...
Hey, they're coming to town on my birthday! Sweet! Wait... what was the rest of that press release?
...with support from Suicide Silence, Darkest Hour and Rise To Remain.
Shit. I didn't see that coming. Let's see what we're working with here (after the jump).
Black Sabbath are back – and here’s why you need to be excited (Part 2)
I originally posted the above video in the comments section of my last post (click), but I couldn't help but think it was worthy of its own post. Just look at that performance. Even Ozzy has some energy in him. More than me actually, and I'm young enough to be his great, great, great grandson.
If you still think this Black Sabbath reformation is nothing to be excited about, or the band don't have it left in them to still perform, you are wrong.
Black Sabbath are back – and here’s why you need to be excited
11-11-11, it doesn't matter whether you're European, whether you're American, or if you're from Mars (Where the average American thinks Europe is), that date format should be correct to all around the universe. It is known as the day when the greatest Metal band of all time, its creators, Black Sabbath announced they are to reform.
Now, I am aware of the following things:
1. "The band have reunited with Ozzy in 1997 and continued to 2006 without releasing any new music."
2. "Even if they did release new material, it will suck"
3. "I saw the band in 2004 and they sucked".
4. "Ozzy is pretty much dead and probably being controlled by Sharon with a remote control. He even needs a Teleprompter"
But here's the thing... The band could have easily NOT have reformed before sadly, one by one, members pass away. This could be your last time to see the band, and speaking as someone who hasn't, I want this opportunity and so should you. It's a world tour, so where ever you are, go see the band!
Next, Sabbath plan to finally release a new album. I know things fell through last time, but hopefully this time it'll be different. Look, it's 2011 and we KEEP being reminded how records supposedly "don't sell anymore". It's being drummed into us on a daily basis. Bands reform and they go on as a nostalgia act touring big festivals and odd shows in order to make a buck (see Faith No More, Rage Against the Machine etc). This is different, the band seem to still have that fire inside of them and that desire to continue making music. Frankly, I don't care if it's not their best, but a brand new Sabbath album in 2012 or 2013, or whatever, amongst the Lady Gagas and Keishas of this shitty time in music, is an astonishing thing.
If you're not excited for this reunion, you know where the X is 
Drugs R Us
It matters not one whit if people want to face up to it or not, the truth is that drugs and metal have gone hand in hand since way before metal was called metal – but if you’re going to a gig which drug should you take to maximize/enhance your experience to the max and what should you avoid?
Weed/Hash – The metalhead’s staple diet. Virtually all of existence is better lived whilst stoned but in this day and age the Smoking Nazi’s pounce like hungry lions if you light up at a gig, so smoking a whole spliff in peace is tricky, you can grab a few quick hits off a bowl but again if you’re spotted you’ll have to waste time fighting security and you miss the show. Presumably you could ingest your herb but then it’s all in the lap of the gods as far as timing goes and you’re bound to fuck it up. My advice is to cane the bong mercilessly before the gig, then top yourself up with alcohol at the venue.
Ecstasy – An unbelievably good drug to consume at a rave, or even at a metal gig if you’re going to stand at the back, but if you want to be in more of a crush nearer the stage ecstasy doesn’t really fit – it’s hard to feel euphoric when dozens of people are pushing and shoving and treading all over your feet. Though it does work well with the volume.
Whizz – Personally I have no time for amphetamine sulphate, it gives a weak dirty little buzz. The only reason to take whizz at a metal gig or anywhere else for that matter is if you want to drink your body weight in Special Brew without getting pissed, or if you want to stay awake for a few days.
Shrooms – An excellent concert buzz, but not for the inexperienced – taking shrooms at a gig can be overwhelming if you’re not head-strong, plus it’s easy to vomit if your stomach wants to get in on the action too.
Coke – Not a good concert drug, metal or otherwise (not a good rave drug either but that’s another story). Okay you may have ground up a load prior to the event so you could stick it in a bullet in your pocket so you have no problems with consumption, but the buzz, although fantastic if you’ve got good product just doesn’t sit well with extreme volume. Fuck knows how Sabbath et al used to play off their nuts on it night after night; I think it says more about their addictions than their enjoyment of coke.
Angel Dust – Fuel for the mosh if you know what you’re doing, but like shrooms it shouldn’t be considered unless you have ample experience.
Acid – And so to the greatest concert drug ever made, there really isn’t anything else quite like it. If you’re never taken acid at a gig before and you’re planning on giving it a try go easy. There will be other gigs, other nights; there is no need to go banzai your first time out. Depending on your physicality maybe take it easy the next time too, there really is no rush. But eventually you’ll be able to sit in the pub a couple of hours before the gig and drop 4 or 5 hits, and then you’ll be in the best possible head space for the ensuing evening. The first time I took acid at a gig was to see Motörhead on the Overkill tour, and it was transcendent. Here’s hoping this Saturday’s gig goes ahead at Hammersmith, if it does look out for me – I’ll be the bloke smiling.
Disclaimer: This article is obviously a joke, if you're straight-edge and suddenly felt the need to do drugs because of this article, you are an idiot. We don't really condone the use of drugs, we just seriously encourage alcohol consumption.
Dan Nelson vs. Anthrax, round 2
We all thought Nelsonthrax drama was over. Dan was out, Belladonna was in, Anthrax finally released Worship Music and Nelson started working on his new band BlackGates. Whenever Ian or Benante were asked in interviews about Nelson, they had nothing but bad things to say about him though. I guess Dan Nelson took notice of that, because he is now suing the band for $2.65 million.
A former lead singer of the band Anthrax filed suit yesterday over the fallout from his 2009 ouster from the popular “thrash” combo founded in New York City.
Dan Nelson says drummer Charlie Benante, bassist Frank Bello and guitarist Scott Ian falsely stated in “numerous interviews” that he had “abruptly resigned” after getting sick, forcing a cancelation of a tour.
The $2.65 million suit also alleges that Benante last month told the rock-news site Blabbermouth.net that Nelson “was a bully.”
The Long Island native says his ex-bandmates’ “intentional defamation” has caused him a loss of income and damaged his reputation.
The Manhattan federal court filing further charges that Nelson co-wrote the tunes on the band’s latest album, “Worship Music,” but hasn’t gotten his fair share of the profits.
Read more: New York Post
As usually, we don't know all details of the story but, with this suit, there is a good chance we will get to know the details sometime in the future.
I can only say the following. Scott Ian and Charlie Benante did talk a whole lot of shit about Dan Nelson in the press. This is speculation, but maybe the band tried to turn Nelson into the bad guy, the only one responsible for this mess, to save face and get back some of their integrity.
I've personally been in steady contact with Dan for quite some time, even though that sadly died down in the past couple of months. I can only say good things about him. He's been extremely nice to me and shared a lot with me. Be it stories or music. So I can't share the "Nelson is a monster" view, unless you're referring to his vocal abilities, with which he shits all over Belladonna.
I can only say this: I can understand why Nelson filed suit, and I hope everyone involved can finally sort this out and put it to rest. This has not just been damaging Nelson's reputation, but also Anthrax's.
Detective Mark to the rescue
I've never had my name in a title before, but now seems like the right time.
Before I embark on my epic post, please note that in the last week or two, I have been very isolated from the internet and general metal boards (not porn boards though, I'm always all over those), so I have no idea whether fans have already been discussing this already or not. However...
Today is the day that Black Sabbath have hinted they will make an announcement. If you have viewed their official site or Facebook page, no doubt you will have already seen the image highlighting the date 11-11-11. Today also happens to be the day that the UK's Download festival will make an announcement (the festival is also celebrating its tenth anniversary).
Can you see where this going?... Today Download will announce that Black Sabbath will be headlining the festival next year (along with Metallica who are already confirmed). This will coincide with Black Sabbath's announcement that the original lineup has reformed.
Am I freaking genius or what? Ok, so it's all pretty damn obvious already, but let me have my moment will you? If I'm wrong, I'll eat my willy.
Stay tuned for the same post in roughly 5 hours and 20 minutes time, only it'll be "official".
Kerrang count down heaviest albums ever. Metalheads laugh.
In the news this week (well, not really news, but certainly lulz worthy), the UK's Kerrang magazine has counted down what they consider to be the 50 heaviest albums of all time. Now, I haven't read the full list, but looking at the top 10, the list is pretty damn shit. To be honest though, I'm just surprised My Chemical Romance, Paramore and Green Day (and yes, I didn't bold those names for a reason) didn't make the cut (and thank God).
The Guardian (a British broadsheet for those that don't know) have posted an article in regards to the top 10, and that's where I have got my information from.
10. Machine Head - Burn My Eyes
9. The Beatles - The White album
8. Sleep - Jerusalem/Dopesmoker
7. Electric Wizard - Dopethrone
6. Discharge - Hear Nothing See Nothing Say Nothing
5. Napalm Death - Scum
4. Mastodon - Leviathan
3. Slipknot - Iowa
2. Converge - Jane Doe
1. Slayer - Reign in Blood
So onto my thoughts...
Well, firstly, The Beatles is an obvious WHAT THE FUCK? You're trying to be 'abstract' and 'quirky' with your definition of "heavy", I get it, I really do. Don't get me wrong, I don't think 'heaviness' is necessarily defined by who can play the fastest and loudest to the point of it being simply noise (a top 10 filled with underground Death Metal bands that play to 60 people a night would be boring), but this is just wrong.
Next... No Metallica? Actually, good.
No Black Sabbath? List has failed completely now. I need not say any more... But I will, because I like the sound of my own voice (or words... only words don't make a sound).
But, kudos for the inclusion of Napalm Death's Scum.
Iowa? That was the heaviest album I had ever heard when it came out. However, I was only 14 then. I assume (nay, hope) that the editors of Kerrang are not 14.
Slayer number one with Reign in Blood? I don't know if I'd put it at number one, but I guess I'd defend its position in the top 10.
Everything else: Erm no, not really. Perhaps DoM should post its own Top 10 heaviest albums of all time (not me though, I listen to Spice Girls in my spare time).
Death ’til Death – Day 7: Obituary
Our Death Metal week is coming to an end. With six bands already having been covered over the course of the past six days, some Death Metalheads might have been missing Obituary. I did not forget about this Florida Death Metal giant, and saved the last spot for them.
Obituary was formed, under the name of Executioner (and shortly after that Xecutioner), in 1984. The name-change to Obituary came in 1988, after they released four demos -- with one interestingly named Metal Up Your Ass, the original title for Metallica's debut album Kill 'Em All. Their first three albums; Slowly We Rot, Cause Of Death and The End Complete; are considered not only Death Metal classics but pioneering works of the scene.
In 1997, the band had grown tired of touring and decided to split up. During their downtime, Allen West, Obituary lead guitarist, famously spend his time playing with Six Feet Under. Their drummer, and brother of vocalist John Tardy, Donald Tardy played with Andrew W.K., including playing on W.K.'s hit album I Get Wet.
The band reformed in 2003, and released three albums since. Obituary still stay true to their roots with their newer material. With their impressive catalogue, they have proved again and again that they're one of the most important bands of the genre. They have achieved legendary status a long time ago and should never be missed when Death Metal is being discussed.
Obituary - Cause Of Death
Death 'til Death introduction - Day 1: Death - Day 2: Possessed - Day 3: Morbid Angel
Day 4: Cannibal Corpse - Day 5: Nile - Day 6: Hypocrisy - Day 7: Obituary
Death ’til Death – Day 6: Hypocrisy
When I originally came up with a list for the Death 'til Death feature, I wanted to include at least one Melodic Death Metal band. Since then, I've written down a few that I've considered for this place and crossed them out again. Amon Amarth were considered, because of how big they are nowadays and by getting more fans, they might lead them to more Death Metal. But I decided not to go with them. In Flames were also considered, because they were one of the first Melodic Death Metal bands around and released some of the most groundbreaking work of the genre. I didn't go with them because of their recent output. At The Gates were next to not be featured, because even though they released some of the most archetypal Melo Death, they mostly inspired upcoming Metalcore bands. And this is not a feature about Metalcore. So who else could be featured on Day 6? Fucking Hypocrisy. Why? Well, because they own and released some of the best Melodic Death Metal ever.
In the late 80's, Peter Tägtgren lived in Florida for three years -- where he was active in the rising Death Metal scene, and played with people like Malevolent Creation's Phil Fasciana. He returned to Sweden in 1990 and formed Hypocrisy. They released their debut album Penetralia in 1992, with Masse Broberg (later Dark Funeral vocalist) on vocals. They released one more album with Broberg, until Tägtgren took over vocal duties.
With the change in vocal position, Hypocrisy also started to change musically and lyrically. While their earlier output was executed well, it wasn't very innovative. That changed with their next album Fourth Dimension, and even more so with their classic Abducted. The band shifted from Death Metal, to atmospheric Melodic Death Metal. Lyrically Tägtgren didn't sing much about usual Death Metal themes, but his lyrics mostly dealt with extraterrestrial and paranormal topics.
Mainman Peter Tägtgren is not only the guitarist, vocalist and producer of Hypocrisy, but also of his side-project Pain. He also produced the likes of Dark Funeral, Marduk, Dimmu Borgir, Amon Amarth, Immortal, Children Of Bodom, Shining and Sabaton. As if that wasn't enough, Tägtgren not only owns a recording studio in Pärlby, but also the entire village it's placed in. That's right, Peter Tägtgren owns a village.
After the critical flop of Catch 22 in 2002, when Hypocrisy flirted with Nu-Metal, they made an impressive return with Virus and the massively underrated A Taste Of Extreme Divinity. The band is now, maybe more than ever before, one of the most respected Extreme Metal bands. Deservingly so.
Hypocrisy - Buried
Death 'til Death introduction - Day 1: Death - Day 2: Possessed - Day 3: Morbid Angel
Day 4: Cannibal Corpse - Day 5: Nile - Day 6: Hypocrisy - Day 7: Obituary
Death ’til Death – Day 5: Nile
Despite being pretty late to the party (no other band in this list released their debut album as late as they did), Nile changed the game and quickly became one of the most respected artists of the scene.
Nile formed in 1993 and released their debut album Among The Catacombs Of Nephren-Ka in 1998. Between 93 and 98, the band recorded two demos, one EP and one single, and toured relentlessly.
Most Death Metal artists lyrically deal with gruesome themes, such as murder, torture, cannibalism or necrophilia. Nile are a notable exception of that, as their lyrics mostly deal with Egyptian themes, Eastern mysticism and religion. Nile therefore categorize their music as "Ithyphallic Metal."
Nile's music could be labelled either traditional Death Metal or Technical Death Metal, as their music combines the groove and heaviness of traditional Death and the speed and complexity of Technical Death.
Despite only releasing six albums since their formation 18 years ago, Nile have never released an album that was considered a critical flop. That is a feature Nile do not share with a lot of their peers, just take a look at Morbid Angel, Possessed or Cryptopsy. Nile therefore are considered a band who might take a lot of time to release an album but always feature constant high-quality output.
Nile - The Howling Of The Jinn
Death 'til Death introduction - Day 1: Death - Day 2: Possessed - Day 3: Morbid Angel
Day 4: Cannibal Corpse - Day 5: Nile - Day 6: Hypocrisy - Day 7: Obituary
Dose of Krisiun
What with Guido’s excellent Death Metal onslaught stomping on our eyeballs this week, I think now is as good a time as any to review Krisiun's new magnum opus – The Great Execution.
Even though executed superbly, is it possible for a death metal album to have too many slow tracks? Yes it is. Does The Great Execution have too many slow tracks? No. But if the fence were any narrower opinion wouldn’t be able to straddle it.
So is it any good? Yep it’s excellent, in my humble opinion, if you like death metal there is no reason why you won’t like this, although to be fair in a couple of places it’s more metal than death metal -- but the Kolesne brothers are playing with such conviction it’s hard not to be swept away.
I dunno if different releases will contain different content but track 11 on my copy is a re-recording of 'Black Force Domain' from their first album released back in ’95. Personally I liked the original fine as it was but there’s nothing wrong with this re-recording either.
Excellent going to work sitting on the bus/tube music, and certainly worth 4.5 skulls out of 5.
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