That’s right people… It’s that time again… You know, where I rate instruments by their appearance and you all get pissed off.
This is the follow-up to my very popular Friday Top 10 about ugly guitars. I was supposed to write this last week, but it was April 1st so we decided to do something special for that day.
But now, without further ado, make the jump and get ready for my very biased opinions!
#10 – Jeff Hanneman’s ESP
I love Heineken, so every time I see their logo, I feel like drinking. So looking at the picture above, I already feel like grabbing an ice cold beer. This is why this guitar is just great, it goes well with my alcoholism.
Those red star inlays probably make Tom Morello jealous as shit, huh? Just get a kid sized strap and get preachy about whom to vote for and you can join RATM, Jeff.
#9 – Kerry King’s B.C. Rich
Well well, the other Slayer guitarist… Now, I wouldn’t necessarily like this tribal design on a guitar, but it just fits Kerry’s tattoos. So it looks badass as shit when Kerry’s playing this thing…
The only other design that fits Kerry is Buckethead’s Flying V with the KFC logo on it.
#8 – Josh Homme’s Epiphone Dot
I know, I know, starting with Slayer and then getting to Chuck Berry’s guitar…. But remember, this is about looks, and this guitar is pretty as hell.
I probably would get my ass kicked playing metal on this thing, but look how big it is… It even looks big on Josh Homme, who’s 9′ 3″ or something…
As a similarly sized guy, I would like this guitar, cause I’m tired of looking like I’m playing Guitar Hero whenever I’m picking a normal one up.
#7 – Zakk Wylde’s Gibson Les Paul
There’s something about this guitar that says “Drink whiskey and don’t shower this year!” so I really like its attitude. Many consider this an ugly design, but I’ve played with one and it looks pretty good.
Sure, it does look like something from Alice In Wonderland but one look at it and you know exactly whose it is. So I think it deserves a mention here.
#6 – Slash’s Gibson Les Paul
The pretty version of the guitar above, this is also a Les Paul and what I love about it is that it just looks classic. Speaking of Alice in Wonderland, Slash plays this thing and I personally consider Gibsons to be some of the best looking guitars out there, so yeah, don’t be surprised if I keep mentioning them.
It’s prettier than Fergie.
#5 – Dave Mustaine’s Dean VMNT
Look at this thing. It makes me want to bitch about Metallica!
I don’t really like Flying Vs but this is really amazing looking. Everything works, aesthetically speaking… It’s one of those guitars that make you just want to pick it up and start playing metal. Beautiful…
#4 – Dimebag’s Dean Dixie Rebel
I know I made fun of the Razorback in the last article but this is a whole other thing. I know the Confederate flag might upset some, but Dime was just using it because he was proud to be from the South, so no harm done. It just looks good on a guitar.
Dime also had a similar paint job, but of a wavy Confederate flag. Couldn’t find a proper photo for this article, but this is what I’m talking about.
I want this guitar!
#3 – Tony Iommi’s Gibson SG
Yet another Gibson. Looks like someone’s paying me to write about them, huh?
I’m kidding, I’m doing this for free (sadly). The Gibson SG reminds me of two great bands: Black Sabbath and AC/DC. So how can it not make the Top 3?
Not a big fan of those crosses, would much rather prefer normal inlays, but this guitar is indirectly responsible for us writing on this site so yeah, deal with it.
#2 – Carlos Santana’s PRS
Without a doubt, PRS makes some of the best looking guitars money can buy… Look at that thing. Everything about it is perfect.
Again, playing metal on this thing might get me bullied, but after I come home, cry a bit and feel sorry for myself, one look at this beauty and the world is alright again. Gorgeous. But what can be ‘gorgeouser’ than this?
#1 – James Hetfield’s Ken Lawrence Explorer
This is it, folks. Many of you may disagree, but I truly believe this is the most beautiful guitar out there, bar none.
It’s custom made, you can’t buy this in a shop, so you can either get a replica somewhere or pay Ken Lawrence around $6,000 for one. Talk about expensive, huh?
I’m not a fan of explorer bodies but there’s something magical about this guitar — and it’s got nothing to do with who’s playing it — It’s just amazing looking.
The photo I’ve used above may not be the most flattering but you’ve all seen it in action, I’m sure. It’s guitar porn at its finest.
So there you have it… The top 10 best looking guitars (in my not-so-humble opinion). Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, sure, but I consider myself better than most of you so my opinion is superior. That’s just how I see things.
