Tag Archives: Shining


Review: Shining lingerie

Shining, Shining, Shining is there anything the black metal masterminds don’t do? When I saw the band had released their own brand of lingerie a few weeks back I just had to get a pair for my girlfriend. After all, there’s nothing hotter than seeing a moist vagina clad in the undergarments branded by a band as sexy as Shining. Metal and sex go hand in hand after all, quite literally (err….).

You can catch my quite brilliant review of the pink g-string (also available in black, purple and red) after the jump.


Where’s all the metal newz?

I’m serious, where is all the Metal news? Thing seem pretty damn quiet today. What gives? Is Metal hibernating? Is it asleep? Is it drunk and passed out outside a strip joint? Am I drunk and passed out outside a strip joint?

Completely unrelated to this post, is the official video of Shining‘s ‘Förtvivlan, Min Arvedel’ above, purely because it kicks a hell of a lot of ass. Watch it and then surrender yourself to Satan, or something.


Keep on Shining you crazy diamond

As we reported previously, Shining‘s first ever single (accompanied with a gorgeously graphic video) recently went Gold, proving that cutting yourself doesn’t necessarily have to be “emo”, and can be mainstream and Metal. Wait, how does any of this even work?

Anyways, moving on… After the success of this first single (which, like Simo, I have no idea how to type), the band have announced they have plans to start work on a second video in October. The second single will be the track ‘Tillsammans Är Vi Allt’ (see, I had to copy and paste that), which of course again is taken from Shining‘s seventh album, VII / Född Förlorare.

If you haven’t heard the album yet, listen to it now! It’s one of the finest releases this year, so far, and is great for fans of all kinds of Metal. But for more on the upcoming video, first check out Shining‘s press statement over at their Facebook page.



Cutting yourself makes you popular

Niklas Kvarforth (Shining)

Swedish black/experimental/slash metal  band Shining had their first-ever single (whose name I can’t possibly type) certified gold, proving that you can cut yourself and be popular at the same time, unlike the high school fat chicks who treat their thighs with razors once a week after they’ve had too many donuts.

Where was I? Oh yeah, Shining. In case you’re not familiar, I’d recommend reading Guido’s hit article Pain is inspiration (a shining view on black metal), which was featured in yesterday’s Top 10, so go read that one as well. Band frontman Niklas Kvarforth had the following to say:

“I never thought I would have a Shining gold record hanging on my bathroom wall. I want thank all our past, present and future fans for helping us turn our world into a worse place to live, and pray for the day we will be able to infect other countries on such a big scale!”

Quite the attitude he’s got there. We feel great about this, but we’re scared the sudden fame might hit Niklas in the head. I mean, if he starts cutting himself with some pimped up knifes, it simply won’t be the same. Keep it real, dawg!


5 albums to rock your weekend

Picture this: It’s a Saturday night, you’re all alone eating cold pizza, watching crappy television. Everyone else is out having a good night, and you’re home alone crying and using the tears as lubricant to masturbate with. Life couldn’t get any worse, right?

Wrong, you could be me. The picture above is of what is commonly known as a ‘female’. I’ve heard of them before, although I have yet to see or speak to one. But enough about that. If you’ve got nothing to do on this Saturday evening, why not join me as I list five perfect Metal albums that should brighten up your day.

So what are you waiting for? Make the jump in front of a car. I know I will soon.

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