Drugs R Us

It matters not one whit if people want to face up to it or not, the truth is that drugs and metal have gone hand in hand since way before metal was called metal – but if you’re going to a gig which drug should you take to maximize/enhance your experience to the max and what should you avoid?

Weed/Hash – The metalhead’s staple diet. Virtually all of existence is better lived whilst stoned but in this day and age the Smoking Nazi’s pounce like hungry lions if you light up at a gig, so smoking a whole spliff in peace is tricky, you can grab a few quick hits off a bowl but again if you’re spotted you’ll have to waste time fighting security and you miss the show. Presumably you could ingest your herb but then it’s all in the lap of the gods as far as timing goes and you’re bound to fuck it up. My advice is to cane the bong mercilessly before the gig, then top yourself up with alcohol at the venue.

Ecstasy – An unbelievably good drug to consume at a rave, or even at a metal gig if you’re going to stand at the back, but if you want to be in more of a crush nearer the stage ecstasy doesn’t really fit – it’s hard to feel euphoric when dozens of people are pushing and shoving and treading all over your feet. Though it does work well with the volume.

Whizz – Personally I have no time for amphetamine sulphate, it gives a weak dirty little buzz. The only reason to take whizz at a metal gig or anywhere else for that matter is if you want to drink your body weight in Special Brew without getting pissed, or if you want to stay awake for a few days.

Shrooms – An excellent concert buzz, but not for the inexperienced – taking shrooms at a gig can be overwhelming if you’re not head-strong, plus it’s easy to vomit if your stomach wants to get in on the action too.

Coke – Not a good concert drug, metal or otherwise (not a good rave drug either but that’s another story). Okay you may have ground up a load prior to the event so you could stick it in a bullet in your pocket so you have no problems with consumption, but the buzz, although fantastic if you’ve got good product just doesn’t sit well with extreme volume. Fuck knows how Sabbath et al used to play off their nuts on it night after night; I think it says more about their addictions than their enjoyment of coke.

Angel Dust – Fuel for the mosh if you know what you’re doing, but like shrooms it shouldn’t be considered unless you have ample experience.

Acid – And so to the greatest concert drug ever made, there really isn’t anything else quite like it. If you’re never taken acid at a gig before and you’re planning on giving it a try go easy. There will be other gigs, other nights; there is no need to go banzai your first time out. Depending on your physicality maybe take it easy the next time too, there really is no rush. But eventually you’ll be able to sit in the pub a couple of hours before the gig and drop 4 or 5 hits, and then you’ll be in the best possible head space for the ensuing evening. The first time I took acid at a gig was to see Motörhead on the Overkill tour, and it was transcendent. Here’s hoping this Saturday’s gig goes ahead at Hammersmith, if it does look out for me – I’ll be the bloke smiling.

Disclaimer: This article is obviously a joke, if you’re straight-edge and suddenly felt the need to do drugs because of this article, you are an idiot. We don’t really condone the use of drugs, we just seriously encourage alcohol consumption.

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