Friday Top 10: Worst band transformations


Fresh of the recently debuted Korn‘s dubstep track, I got an amazing (and very original) idea for a Top 10: let’s take a look at some of the most drastic transformations in hard rock and metal.

List is mostly based on music, though we all know metal goes hand in hand with fashion, so we’ll feature some of that as well. Read on to find ten examples of some of the most horrific, embarrassing or simply plain stupid transformations, in what is could be the first out of two articles.

#10 – Kornsteppin’

Narcisisstic Cannibal - Korn's latest abomination

Yesterday we got the latest kornstep/dumbstep/n00metal track, and Jesus Christ, why does this band need this? Well, okay, I understand that dubstep is hot and it’s attracting more crowds at shows, and I understand Korn are probably not the band 13-year-olds with big allowances are talking about… Wait, actually, fuck it, if I were 40 and taking care of a family, a drug habit (or are they all Jesus freaks now?) and a pension fund, I’d do what it takes as well.

Still, it would be nice if it wasn’t their personal agenda to lower the bar with each new album release. Just sayin’.

#9 – Queensryche turns pop

They're just getting started

I have no idea how this happened. To be honest, I’m not that much into this band, but even as a bystander I was surprised at the amount of hate this band got for their latest album, Dedicated to Chaos.

#8 – Kiss turns disco

...said Kiss to the almighty dollar.

I guess disco was the dubstep of the late ’70s. Kiss were obviously the Korn of that age (just kidding, Jonathan would need to start taking requests to cry at birthday parties to reach their level), so they jumped the ship and wrote one of their most successful singles, ever.

According to Paul Stanley, they wrote it intentionally, and only to show how easy it was to write a disco song. Just remember, he also said each Kiss product they put out was because fans asked for it, so you be the judge of his honesty.

#7 – Chris Cornell is down with Timbaland


You might be a fan of grunge, you might not be, but there’s no denying Chriss Cornell’s talent. Which makes this even crazier. After spliting with Audioslave, Chris Cornell hired Timbaland (represent) to produce his third solo record, Scream. Result: what do you think it was like, ah? Shit times infinity. Only one person could make a decent song with Timbaland, and you all know who I’m talking ’bout.

Shortly after that, Cornell joined his old bandmates in Soundgarden for a reunion. By the way, I was talking about Justin Timberlake (there, I said it).

#6 – Machine Head’s nu metal years

A unique flower, this album was.

I’ll be short: the band said they were trying to sound different when they started including rap vocals. You know what happened: they sounded like everyone else. Thank fuck they got back on the right track.

#5 – Megadeth takes a risk

Just a little crush...

What can you expect from an album that was the result of Dave Mustaine hearing Lars Ulrich say he doesn’t take too many risks? Something Lars Ulrich would later laugh at, that’s what.

Megadeth‘s most controversial album up do date offered pop rock singles such as the one above, and all sorts of other experimentation.

#4 – Metallica gets angry

Where is the table?

Everyone gets their turn to laugh, and this was Dave’s. Along with the brilliant idea to ditch solos on the record, they outdid themselves, and also ditched drums. Banging trash cans never got anyone more money than it got Metallica with this album.

#3 – Papa Roach turns emo

Papa Roach

Papa Roach. Apparently.

This seriously has to be one of the most what-the-fuck moments in rock’s history. Not that I was surprised these bands would conform to any trends that would get them food stamps (they did switch from nu metal to radio rock before this if you can recall), but what shocked me is that along with watering down their music, this band literally changed everything about them when they turned emo.

I saw this photo above years after the switch has occured, and I actually didn’t believe it was them. I had to google and compare photos to figure it out.

#2 – Limp Bizkit going political on everyone’s asses

It's going down, yo!

I am kind of ashamed to know about this, but I remember Limp Bizkit‘s Rage Against The Machine “politically” charged 15 minutes quite clearly. You know, those after which Wes Borland quit the band for the tenth time…

The unquestionable truth is that this band is good at one thing, and that was “beeing an angsty but radio friendly nu metal band in 2001.”

#1 – Metallica makes a collaboration… with Ja Rule

Ja Rule

Oh my Ja'

Metallica is a band that has had more (failed) transformations than fucking Madonna, so choosing one (more) from their brilliant career of jumping trends and “reinventing” themselves was pretty hard, but the song with Ja Rule (they couldn’t even find a real rapper) easily takes the cake as the absolutely biggest “what the fuck were they thinking” moment. Listen to it here.

I am the table.

Who said that?

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