17
Apr

Weak Recap: We’re amazing

This is our fifth Weak Recap, which means we ran out of writers to interview so I’m back interviewing Guido. God dammit. At least old man river up there approves.

In case you aren’t familiar with this recap thing, it’s a way for us to whore ourselves interview each other by recapping the week’s news. Pretty cool, right? Wrong… It’s lame and self-indulgent but hey, at least it’s original. Most other sites just do basic lists. Blah, we do shit properly, yo.

Make the jump and if you’re truly bored.

Boobs. Something no DoM writer gets to touch... Without paying

 

Alex: Hi Guido, how’s shit? Nice to have you back on Weak Recap.
Guido: Shit’s good. Listening to metal (Mortician right now), the weather’s fine, I can’t complain really.

A: It’s been a full month since we started this, how does it feel being a pioneer?
G: The big question is, do people even read this? If they aren’t, they can kiss my ass but that means they can’t read that they’re supposed to kiss my ass. Get my point? Me neither.

A: So our week started with Greg Puciato talking about file-sharing. What’s your take on piracy?
G: I think it’s a great thing to get your music heard, even by people who usually wouldn’t listen to it. I do think it’s theft and therefore it’s pretty obvious to me why it’s illegal though. It has its’ pros and cons.

A: Then you reviewed Debauchery and gave them 3 skulls. Why was that?
G: It’s not a bad album. I really like it but I don’t think it’s a good album for people who aren’t already familiar with Debauchery. It’s a big step up from ‘Rockers & War,’ their previous album, but it’s no ‘Torture Pit.’

A: Mark went for a classic Black Sabbath album, Heaven and Hell. What did you think of his review?
G: I actually completely agree with him. It’s not typical Sabbath but it’s a great album in its’ own right.

A: Children still suck at instruments, right?
G: I think it’s great to start playing instruments as early as possible but people shouldn’t upload videos of them playing, unless they’re really good at it. If you suck, it’s only fair to make fun of you. No matter how old you are. If you’re getting positive feedback, then there should also be place for negative feedback.

A: I did a Spotlight feature on a Metallica tribute band. What did you think of them?
G: James Hetfield should take notes because that’s how you sing properly.

A: What about tribute bands in general, any opinions on them?
G: I’m not really a fan of them, to be honest. I generally don’t like musicians who don’t write their own music. It’s a big part of being a musician.

A: Apparently Metallica is the most played metal band ever, according to Simo’s Tuesday Trivia. Did that surprise you?
G: Not at all. I already knew that popular music sucks. Check out that article again and click the link to the original list. Their most played song is ‘Nothing Else Matters.’ That says it all.

A: Speaking of Metallica, Stephen King still listens to them. Is he stuck in the 80s or what?
G: I found it way more interesting that he listens to Anthrax. Never pictured him as a metalhead. Maybe he can sing for them. I’m sure they don’t mind firing Belladonna once again

A: Chris went all patriotic on our asses and talked about five Canadian metal bands. Ever listened to any of them?
G: Yes, Cauldron spring to mind. Musically, I like them but vocally, they’re piss poor.

A: Is Europe better than North America?
G: In terms of music? No doubt about it.

A: ROFLCOPTER: Lady Gaga tries hard to impress metalheads. She’s awful, isn’t she?
G: She?

ROFLCOPTER is metal

A: Speaking of awful, Shatner is recording an album with Zakk Wylde and others. It sounds like a bad April Fool’s joke, right?
G: I’m so looking forward to that album. I love William Shatner. Boston Legal kicked ass.

A: There’s no one left in Chimaira. Do you think they should get this kid in the band?
G: I lost interest in Chimaira after their selftitled album. If this kid joined them, I’d definitely give them another listen.

A: This week’s Friday Top 10 was about metal hair. What did you think of the article?
G: I sympathize with Kerry King.

A: Charlie Sheen has heard of Asking Alexandria. I haven’t. Have you?
G: I only know AskJol… wait, I can’t link porn sites on here, can I? I guess, I shouldn’t.

A: Andy McKee can play the electric guitar. Are you surprised?
G: That’s some antivirus software, right?

A: Any last words for the 2 people reading this interview?
G: Hi Mark! Hi Simo!


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